The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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