Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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