i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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