All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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