I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
