when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
