Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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