yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
my vag is so smooth its legendary
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
