i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
