Quick, to the slutcave!
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
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