We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
