Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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