Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize