im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Randomize
