Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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