I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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