He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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