Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
