I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize
