i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
