It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
