does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
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