I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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