I'm eating all of the evidence.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize