so explain again why im purple
no
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
