I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
