I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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