Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
