Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Pants are for mortals
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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