she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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