Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
