But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Randomize
