PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize