the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Two words: nipple clamps
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