I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize