Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
