I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
