Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
