She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
