i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
