Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Randomize