i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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