When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize