I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize