There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
