ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
