Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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