He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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