i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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