they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Randomize
